Back to Spring 2022

how to end up just like your father

 

I fuel the fireplace through winter

burning my eyes

like trying to look too closely at the sun

 so hot, my hands look just like my father’s:

chef’s hands - numb.


He showed me how to hold a hatchet

to carve my body into new shapes

how to chisel away until years disappear 

and all that’s left are 

splinters on the floor.


The ax forgets

like the tool it is

               but now my body embodies all of the things

                    I swore I wouldn’t 

     become.


You can’t unlearn how to split 

yourself into pieces,

just to become kindling

In someone else's

 fire.