Back to Winter ‘21

Letter to my Therapist

BY JULIANNA McCANN

It’s not you, it’s me.

Maybe it’s you.

Thing is, you picked me up

off the ground when I was

a chipped china doll,

pressed me back together

and dressed me in satin.

I love you for that.

But here I am

in my silk-soft dress

and I don’t want to be soft

anymore.

A dagger-sharp tongue

doesn’t have to be a weakness.

I want my edges back. I want to shout.

Susan, I want to be so loud

the skies bow down.

 

is this normal,

or am i strange?

BY JULIANNA McCANN

In this unwelcome world,

sunlight bites

and street signs scream.

There’s a shudder

on my shoulders from a shadow

no one sees.

Sometimes, there’s nothing

I want more than to float

up, up, and away. But dissociation

isn’t an answer.

When the sun starts to shriek

that’s when I sit

and try my best to breathe.

Sometimes, air mocks

my mouth, teases and

dances away.

Fingers tingle

before I faint,

sometimes.

Sometimes not.

This world is

one thousand wars

I never signed up for.